Just One More Day
by littledd
Summary: Susan's nightmares are getting worse and she can't think about anything except the person she left behind. And Caspian, now King, cannot stop reliving old memories. Will one more day really change things? Or will it just hurt more when it all ends? AU, S/
1. Another Dream

**Hey everybody! I just recently watched the new Narnia movie and instantly fell in love with it. That means, of course, that I had to write something about it . Basic plot line, but I hope you'll enjoy it nonetheless. Thanks!**

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Swords clanged, ringing with force and jagged blades ripped and tore. Fangs flashed and gnawed and unsheathed claws gouged. Everything seemed to be covered in a haze of red, but the girl running didn't notice. Her clear, ice-blue eyes were wild, darting in all different directions. Her hair flew behind her, the dry wind snatching at her brown locks. And on her lips, there was only one word, the desperate scream drowned out by the roars and wails of a raging battle.

"_Caspian!_"

Her voice cracked as she lost her footing and fell. She felt her ankle strain under her and twist the wrong way as she fell on top of it. There was a sickening crack as the ground rushed up to meet her, and her mouth opened in a silent scream. Her eyes squeezed shut in pain, teeth grinding together; it was broken, she knew it. She tried to lift herself from the ground, but her arms buckled from the weight, and she crumpled into a heap. She let out a bitter sob and pounded the ground with tightly-clenched fists. She _had_ to find him, she had to. Before it was too late.

Suddenly, a shadow fell across her. She look up, prepared to see a sneering Telmarine or a gleaming, blood-stained sword, prepared to strike. Nothing would have prepared her for those eyes, that face, that smile…

"Caspian!" His smile grew wider, and stretched a hand towards her.

"Queen Susan…are you sure you don't want that horn?" His eyes smiled at her, shining with mirth. Susan felt her own lips curve up in response.

"I don't need it. You're here, aren't you?" Gently, she placed her hand in his, her own pale fingers dwarfed by his larger palm. His thumb caressed her skin before closing completely around her hand, spreading the heat that seemed to travel steadily up her arm. Then, in one fluid movement, his hand circled her waist and lifted her into the air, setting her down gingerly on one foot. She was much closer now, and the heat that had started with his touch now spread from her middle where he held her securely, but gently.

The battle lost its sound, the air lost its suffocating tension. Everything moved with a curious slowness and the red haze that had been so prevalent before lifted as if it had never been. It was as if there was only her and Caspian, Caspian and her. His eyes reflected the setting sun, flecks of gold sparkling in chocolate. His hair danced across his face, touching his brow, his nose, his lips…her Prince, Narnia's King.

King, king…what was it? Something gnawed on the edges of her thoughts, bothering her. What had she come here for? What was it that had been so important? What did she need to do? The answer flirted with her, staying just out of reach of her frustrated thoughts. It was important, she knew that much. Something to with Caspian. A warning…

Susan didn't see it coming. She didn't see the shadow that crept up behind Caspian. She didn't see the sword raised over his head, she didn't see Miraz's chilling smile…not until it was too late.

"Caspian, watch out! _Behind you!!_" But the sword had already plunged forward and all turned deathly silent. Susan saw Miraz's lips pull back in vicious grin as his hands thrust the blade forward, feeling Caspian's hands on her suddenly loosen. She saw Caspian's expression turn into horror then pain as his whole body convulsed once, twice. She saw the blade pierce him through, the bloody tip coming out through his stomach just inches from her own body, then saw it ripped back, tearing through him a second time. She saw his expression change once more from earlier pain, to shock, and then to a deep sadness as his eyes locked with her own horrified, aghast ones. And then, she saw him fall.

"_No!!_" Susan sat up straight in her bed, body covered in a sheen of sweat. Two trails of tears still coursed down her cheeks and her hands gripped fistfuls of crumpled sheets. What was this? Caspian, he… Susan's eyes darted across the room, taking in the familiar desk, dresser, and closet. Looking frantically to her right, the hands of the clock read 2:30 AM. Realization swept over her and she unclenched her fists, burying her face in her trembling hands. She'd seen the blood, she'd seen him fall…and it had all been a dream.

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He tossed the quill to the side, letting it roll off the large stack of paperwork and off the desk. It was no use; he wasn't going to get any work done. At least, not with the dream he had last night playing out in front of him over and over again. It taunted him with her sweet face, her crystal eyes, those full lips…she was more beautiful than ever, even with her cheeks stained with dirt and tears. The whole day, he kept feeling her fragile, delicate, unbelievably _soft_ hand in his, kept seeing her radiant smile. Even when the sword had been driven through him, it had only hurt for a moment. It was that overwhelming feeling of grief that had taken over everything. Grief at leaving her just after he'd found her. Grief at not being able to see her smile again. Grief at the realization that it had all been a dream when he woke up.

Just another dream.

"Professor, I'm going…out. I'll be back soon." Professor Cornelius didn't say anything but lowered his glasses, watching the young man swipe the back of his hand across his eyes before swinging a cloak around his shoulders and running out the door. The old man sighed. It took a long time for a heart to heal; he just hoped Caspian was healing the right way.


	2. A Love Too Late

The tree branches whipped at his face and arms, but he only urged his horse faster. The forest flew past him in strange, dark shadows until all he could hear was his own breathing and the steady beat of hooves against the ground. He had to get away from it all, get away from any reminders of _her._ He felt as if he was suffocating in memories and all he wanted was to just let the tears flow, to succumb to those memories. But the whole kingdom of Narnia rested on his shoulders. He couldn't appear vulnerable, couldn't show any signs of weakness. But he was so tired of fighting it, so tired of putting on a mask everyday. He needed to just…be. Just for a little while.

Caspian finally stopped outside a little clearing and swung off the horse's back, tying the reigns securely to a tree before stepping into the clearing.

Moonlight flooded the air around him, the soft grass conforming to his footprints. There was one lone tree standing proudly in the middle, its gnarled branches reaching out towards the midnight sky. The green foliage turned silver in the moonlight and as Caspian sat down beneath them, he could feel the roughness of the warm bark against his back. Patches of light shone through the leaves as he looked heavenward, illuminating the ground around the tree in glowing pieces. He took a deep breath, inhaling the crisp night air. Finally, he could breathe. Finally, he could let go.

At his silent permission, the flood gates opened. All the brief, precious moments he had shared with her flooded back with so much force that he was left breathless. When he'd first lay eyes on her, he remembered feeling a sense of complete awe. The eyes that shone like thousand-faceted diamonds, the full, rose-petal lips that parted just the smallest bit, the slightly stubborn chin…it was branded in his thoughts. And then, he'd seen her fight. Those were movements so fluid, so quick, and so precise that it put even his own skills to shame. Those eyes missed nothing, moving from target to target with unerringly accurate arrows following soon after each glance.

The flood was almost too strong, and Caspian let out a strangled, desperate sound. He knew he'd kept it locked away for far too long. Even at the castle, he'd tried his best to avoid all parts of it that were too painful. Like the courtyard….especially the courtyard. He closed his eyes, prepared to push it back, but abruptly stopped himself. He needed to remember…

When Peter presented him with that sword, he'd been overwhelmed. He'd promised to take good care of it until they returned. He remembered feeling so proud, so pleased that he'd been trusted with such an important task. Maybe he'd done something right after all. Nothing would have prepared him for what was said next. Caspian didn't know how utterly painful, destroying, devastating words could be until that moment. Just when everything was going right, it all shattered.

"That's just it," she had said, not aware of the power of the words she was saying, "We're not coming back." He'd thought it was a joke. Not coming back? No, it wasn't possible, it didn't stand to reason. It couldn't be…But when all four of the Pevensie faces wore the same look of regret and sadness, two more severe than the others, Caspian's disbelief and denial lost its anchor. All that was left was a throbbing, painful hole.

She was never coming back.

As his unbelieving eyes took in Lucy, Edmund and Peter going around and bidding goodbye to various Narnian creatures, he saw her coming towards him.

She looked painfully beautiful. The edge of her blue and white brocaded gown seemed to glide across the courtyard ground as she walked toward him. He could see her quietly settle her face, changing her expression from grief to a fragile composure.

"I'm glad I came back," she said, the tenuous smile holding just barely before slipping.

"I wish we had more time together." He wasn't as brave, as selfless as she was, and he was sure the pain on his face wasn't concealed as well as her's was.

"It would never have worked anyway."

"Why not?" Despite the threatening tears, he was surprised. She smiled.

"I _am_ 1300 years older than you." He laughed quietly. Even in the last minutes, he was still falling for her. She turned away then, and he was absolutely terrified. Being in battle was frightening, but you could do something about it; you were fighting, you had some control over the outcome of things. But in that moment, he had no choice but to wait for either something or nothing to happen, feeling his heart palpitating wildly in his chest. Could this be the last time he would ever see her?

And then she'd turned back.

Her lips were upon his with such a bruising tenderness that it made him shiver with the intensity of it. He could feel her small, warm hand on the back of his neck, drawing him closer, feeling his lips burning, searing. Sensation swept through him like a torrential flood, sharpening the tender pressure of her lips on his, so much so that he could hardly bear the sweetness of it. And for one glorious moment, he felt whole, satiated. She completed him.

Too soon, they were apart, and he saw the tiny crystals of tears that clung to her thick lashes. He remembered again the reason for those tears, and it hurt just as much the second time as it had the first. She couldn't leave, no, he wouldn't let her…In a moment of panic, he enveloped her in his arms.

It felt so…right. He savored in the feeling of her arms encircling his in response, clinging to him. He buried his head in her neck, inhaling the sweet scent of her skin, feeling the softness of her hair against his cheek. He wanted to hold her like this forever, to protect her from any and all harm, to defend her, to love her…

_To love her._

It was in that moment that he realized why her face had haunted him day and night. Why every time their eyes met, his heart skipped a beat. Why every time they spoke, he mulled over what he was going to say over and over again before finally pronouncing them, stuttering like a schoolboy. Why every time he drew his sword, he told himself he was going to make it through, just to see her again.

He loved her.

He felt her shoulders tremble just the slightest bit as he held her tighter, heard the softest whimper as his hands tightened against her waist, and knew she had come to the same realization.

But it was all too late.

Cold air filled the space between them as they pulled apart, bringing the cruel truth of the present along with it. Her eyes were shining, blazing with an ice-blue fire they cut through him like a searing blade, leaving the wound raw and bleeding. How could this happen? Just when he had found the most precious realization, it was lost to him.

She'd walked away then, branding him with one last tear-filled, burning, tender gaze before stepping through the door in the air.

Gone.

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**Much love, please review! **


	3. Care Enough to Dream, Love Enough To Die

**Thanks for all the reviews, I really appreciate the support. I _love_ feedback!**

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**_Chapter 3_**

"Susan! _Susan!!_" She blinked.

"What?"

"The _tea!!_" The brown liquid had overflowed and was now brimming over the lip of the teacup, spilling onto the white linen tablecloth underneath. With a start, she righted the teakettle and set it down on the spreading stain, backing away from the table. She hadn't even realized she was pouring tea. When had she even picked up the kettle?

"Really Sue, you could try to be more careful," said Peter sternly, but seeing Susan's look of bewilderment, his expression softened to one of concern. He put down the cloth he was using to mop up the table and wiped his hands, taking a step closer to his sister. She backed away. "Susan? Are you alright?" She blinked and saw the worry etched deep on Peter's face.

"I'm-I'm alright, Peter. Don't worry about me." She managed a weak smile before trudging up the worn, wooden stairs. "I…I'm going upstairs. I just need….I need some…" Before she could finish her sentence, the door had shut quietly and her soft string of nonsensical words came to an abrupt stop. Peter stood at the bottom of the stairs, one hand holding a dripping, stained washcloth and the other gripping the banister of the stairwell so tightly that his knuckles turned white.

It had been like this ever since they'd come back from Narnia. He, Edmund and Lucy had already begun to process of adjusting themselves to England, but Susan stubbornly refused to. In the beginning, it wasn't as bad. She would just be unfocused at times, but then with a start and a following smile, she'd be back. But it got worse everyday. She walked around listlessly now, her body going through routine motions, yet her eyes remained dead and unseeing. Susan wasn't _there_ anymore; it was just a shell that looked like her. He was watching his sister atrophy, watching her cheerful spirit and her kind heart dwindle away. She was dying inside.

Peter suspected he knew what was causing it, too. He'd seen the kiss, he'd seen the tears that she'd tried so hard to hide. And he'd seen that she couldn't forget him. He didn't know how many times he had woken to the sound of Susan's screams and sobs in the middle of the night, how long it had been since he had seen light in her eyes. The only time she would go back to her old self was when there was talk of Narnia, and even so, those instances were getting fewer. Soon, there would be nothing.

His hand tightened on the banister, his knuckles screaming from the effort. It was all happening right in front of his eyes…and yet there was nothing he could do about it. He felt so helpless, so powerless, and he hated that. His own sister, and all he could do was to stand to the side! Peter sighed, releasing his fingers from their death grip on the banister. He just hoped that the person who could do something would be willing to help.

For Susan's sake.

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The familiar settings of the room provided no comfort, even with sunshine streaming into the room. It just made everything too bright. Susan pulled the shades closed, shutting out the light. The room returned to darkness. Quiet, still, tranquil darkness.

Friendly darkness.

She'd had another nightmare last night. This time, she was chasing after him. She could see those eyes beckoning to her, calling her and her heartbeat raced. He'd smiled gently, reaching out a hand towards her.

"Susan," he had said softly, and she'd started running after him. But no matter how fast she ran, she could never seem to reach him. He was always a step faster, his fingers just a hair-breadth away from her straining ones.

Suddenly, the ground had given away under her, and she'd fallen. Faster and faster she plummeted, watching the dark walls around her rise and the circle of light above her growing smaller and smaller. And then she'd seen his silhouette against the blazing sun. His silhouette that had moved precariously close to the edge of the hole…and jumped.

She'd woken up then, screaming as usual, frantic and tear-filled eyes adjusting themselves to the darkness before the cries faded into sharp, ragged breaths. It was always the same, immobile, hulking pieces of furniture that greeted her, always the same, infuriating tick-tock of the clock, every time reporting some ungodly hour, that met her straining ears. And she was so tired. So tired of seeing his beautiful face twist into anguish every night in her nightmares. So tired of pretending to go through a normal routine, only to be still bombarded by questions and concerns. So tired of hurting the others around her. So tired of waking up sobbing and holding herself together, all the while wishing that it was someone else's strong arms that encircled her instead.

So tired of caring enough to dream, of loving enough to die.

Suddenly, she heard a tapping on her window. Curious, she lifted her head up. The sound came again.

Tap, tap, tap…

Against all odds, she started to hope. Her bruised and battered heart picked up pace, unable to resist the temptation of a tenuous possibility. Her fingers shook as they touched the coarse fabric of the curtains. Maybe...no, hoping for _him_ would be too much. _Maybe_, she would see Reepicheep, Trufflehunter, Trumpkin…one of them, any of them, tapping on the window…please...

Tap, tap, tap…

Her fingers gripped the edge of the fabric…

Tap, tap, tap…

She tore open the curtains…

Tap, tap, tap…

_She would never learn._

The raindrops were hitting faster on the window pane now, the water droplets splattering against the glass in a crescendo of rhythmic cadence.

Tap, tap, tap tap tap tap taptaptaptaptaptaptaptap…

Susan's tears mirrored the liquid running down the window, the salty drops winding down her cheeks. Her hands still clutched the curtains, the one remaining part of her that still refused to give up. She didn't know how much longer she could take this torture, this cruelty that she constantly afflicted on herself. She had told herself over and over again, _not_ to expect, _not_ to hope. But her heart was so hungry, so desperately eager for anything thrown its way, whether it was a flash of dark brown locks, an echo of a familiar voice, or even a tap on a window…Susan could feel her mind begin to lose its hold on reality and she gripped her head in her hands, a low, anguished sob escaping her. Too much, it was all too much…

She was going to break.

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**Mucho love for reading; review please!! **


	4. Decisions

**A/N: Thanks to all who have reviewed, I really appreciate it. I really value every thought that you have, so don't hesitate to put down any reaction you have to this; constructive criticism is much appreciated. Thanks again!**

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**Chapter 4**

_(continuation of last scene in Chapter 3)_

"Let me go back…" she whimpered, her breath coming out in a ragged whisper, the powerful sobs shaking her shoulders. She collapsed onto the floor in a heap, drawing breaths in uneven, gasping gulps and fighting the blackness that was closing in, tightening around her chest. She pulled her knees to her torso and rocked, her arms wrapped around herself in a vice grip as if trying to hold herself together. "Aslan, please, just let me see him…Aslan…"

She couldn't breathe it was closing in tighter tighter need him my prince need to see him falling apart Caspian falling falli—

Dark.

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The rain fell harder, the individual droplets drumming on his soaked skin. Lightning flashed, whitewashing the sky, and thunder echoed soon after, its deep, sonorous rumble shaking the earth. Wind, not to be outdone, howled wildly, changing the direction of the raindrops with every gust and wailing through the forest like a lost ghost. The man sitting underneath the tree looked heavenward, trying to find the steadily disappearing stars. The cold seeped through him, running in his veins like ice, freezing his insides, and he let it. Maybe it would dull the pain.

He closed his eyes.

He had just remembered it all. He'd seen the days run before him as if they were right before his eyes. Those glorious days when he'd catch a glimpse of her now and then, talking with her brothers and sisters, or even sneaking a glance at him. And then she'd blush, that rosy tinge spreading on her cheek, looking away too quickly for him to smile back. It all had come back. He thought this would help, he thought he would find peace in acceptance. That he would go on, stronger than before and able to rule Narnia without the pain of the past clouding his judgment.

So foolish.

The pain that was dulled by denial before rose up like a hungry flame, eating away at the memories he had just brought back. It blazed like a monster now, destroying any shred of composure he had. All that was left now was a hideous, all-consuming longing. It added to the cold inside him, a fire that burned like ice. It gripped onto his heart and squeezed the warmth from it, every drop draining him. He thought he had helped himself, but all he had done was drive the blade deeper.

He didn't think it was possible to still have tears left, but there they were, defiantly rolling down his rain-soaked skin. They mixed with the frigid raindrops and lost their heat. Everything was so cold.

So very, very cold.

A light?

What started as a pinprick in all the darkness steadily grew brighter and brighter. It ripped through Caspian lifted his hands to block the brightness. He couldn't see anything, and even when he closed his eyes, the radiance blinded him. He tried to back away but found the firm trunk of the tree against his back. Trapped.

The light grew stronger still and Caspian could just barely make out a bleary shape emerging through the light. Still, he tried to run away but it was as if his body was sucked dry of strength; he didn't even have the strength to lift himself up. His terror grew as the shape took on form and definition. It grew larger and larger…

Gold. A beautiful, liquid, warm gold.

The rain stopped.

Caspian's strength came back in a rush and he fell on his knees, frame shaking in awe. He'd been too weak, too inadequate, not fit to be Narnia's king. And it was all over now; _he_ was coming to take it back. He suddenly wondered if it would hurt terribly if large, powerful teeth ripped you to pieces? Suddenly, he felt a sweet, warm breath run across him and all the tension and worry disappeared.

"Rise, my Son," came the deep voice.

And Caspian finally looked into the eyes of Aslan.

There was a flood of emotions. Awe, terror, love, humility, comfort, but most of all, calm. His heart that had been frozen started to melt, and slowly the blood in his veins became hot and living again. Those great golden eyes seemed to see through him as if he was a piece of thin glass, but they didn't judge. They carried a love in their molten depths that shook Caspian and seemed to offer an understanding that he that would undeserved. The great lion shook his mane, and suddenly, the darkness didn't seem so dark anymore.

"When Aslan shakes his mane, there will be spring again," mused Caspian to himself and the air seemed to clear, sweet smell permeating the clearing.

"And do you believe that, Son of Adam?"

Caspian dropped his gaze in shame, tears pricking at his eyes. "I'm sorry Aslan, I haven't ruled Narnia well; I've been distracted and I've let you down. I am not fit to sit on the throne."

"My dear Caspian, I have not come to berate you, nor have I come to take your crown. I have given it to you, therefore it is rightfully yours."

"They why—"

"The Queen is in peril, your Majesty."

Caspian froze. A thousand images flashed in front of his eyes: Susan with a blade held forced at her pale throat, Susan surrounded in a dark room with no way out, Susan on the ground with a pool of blood forming around her unmoving body, Susan tripping and falling to the bottom of the stairs, her neck bent at an unnatural angle…

Reflexively, his hand immediately flew to the hilt of his sword, all the while his breath growing shallower. A cold sweat broke over his skin and he felt his pulse begin to race in pure, unadulterated terror. If anything happened to her, anything at all….

"What happened? Is she safe?"

"Do not panic, your Majesty; Queen Susan is not in any immediate danger. But there is a decision that you must make. She has already made her's." At the Lion's apparent calm, Caspian's heartbeat began to slow.

"I'm afraid I don't understand. What decision? What happened to Sus…the Queen?"

"She has lost hope. She's pulled back so far into herself that all that is left is a shell. She cannot hold on to even that shell for much longer, because there's someone in Narnia she can't let go of and it is that knowledge that causes her the most pain."

Caspian's throat closed as conflicted thoughts clashed inside him. He felt dread, knowing that whatever danger she was in was because of him. But there was also a muted sense of joy; she hadn't forgotten him.

"Why can't she…let go?" asked Caspian with some difficulty, praying and hoping for an answer he know he would regret.

"A love is very hard to forget."

So that was it, then. He was the reason Susan was in agony, the reason that she had lost hope in herself.

He loathed himself.

Because he knew the pain that Susan was experiencing was the same torture that he was going through now: heartbreak, and the terrible, aching longing that followed. It was the kind of torment that ate you from the inside out, destroyed you, consumed you. He could only imagine that it was the same for her...Susan, sweet, beautiful, gentle Susan...Caspian wanted to rip his heart out.

"She has made a request, your Majesty."

"A request?"

"She wishes to come back again."

He didn't let himself hope, he didn't let himself believe, because it would be too painful when it all shattered.

"…You said that the High King and Queen were never returning to Narnia…you told us, Aslan."

"Yes, I did. But it is clear that you cannot forget her, either. And under those circumstances, your ruling Narnia would put it into chaos. So I've come to give you a decision, your Majesty."

"A decision?"

"Yes, but more a choice. I can make both you and Susan forget the other's memories of the other, so that it will be as if you had never met. Or, I can give you both one more day together, fulfilling Susan Pevensie's wish. Choose wisely, my King, for your decision will be affecting not only yourself but Queen Susan as well. "

One more day together…Caspian's mind raced. Forgetting would be painless, it would be easy. Both of them would be happy and they would be free to go on with their lives without anything holding them back. But Caspian couldn't bring himself to forget her. He'd finally found her, the person that he felt whole with, a person that even the mere mention of their name could make his heart skip a beat. To forget love seemed like the most terrible of sins to Caspian; it was too precious, too rare, too beautiful a thing to just throw away. And if it caused him infinite pain, infinite agony, infinite heartbreak, he would endure it. He would ask Aslan to spare Susan of the hurt and direct it towards him; he would take it all. It was well worth it, if just for another moment, another touch. If just for another smile.

"One more day with her, Aslan. I choose one more day."

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	5. Reunion

**A/N: Hey everyone, thanks again for reading. Just a warning for this chapter: extreeeemely long-winded. It's very descriptive, and basically a three page thing describing a, at max, five minute scene. But I really wanted to catch how profound the moment was. If there are any sections you think that I could delete, please just review and tell me; I'm looking too :) Thanks again, and happy reading!**

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**Chapter 5**

It was too bright.

Even in the first moments waking, Susan noticed the difference. The hot light streamed in the room and fell on her, making her turn her bleary gaze away from the unwelcome heat. She closed her eyes, but the bothersome light on her eyelids turned everything a vivid red. It was strange; she always closed the curtains at night. She must have forgotten.

With effort, Susan rolled over and reached for the curtains with one hand, eyes still closed against to block out the blazing sunshine. But to her surprise, her hand closed around nothing but air. Susan made another grab, but again, nothing.

Frustrated, she propped herself up on one arm, prepared to yank the curtains closed, and opened her eyes.

The first thing she noticed was the size of the room. It was much bigger than her own bedroom, and there were pictures on the wall she had never seen before. In fact, the most beautiful pictures she had ever laid eyes on, so delicately drawn that the pictures seemed to able to jump out of the golden, carved frames. The next thing she noticed was the absence of her monotonous furniture; she didn't see her desk, dresser, or closet. Instead, there was a solid oak desk covered with intricate carvings and a velvet-cushioned chair in the corner, its braided, golden tassels sweeping the maple floor that seemed to glow in the sunlight. She turned to her left and saw the silk hangings cascading down the side of the bed, and when she touched it, the soft, rose-scented fabric ran through her fingers like water.

By this point, Susan knew it was quite possible she was dreaming again, but she wasn't completely sure; all she had now were nightmares and so far, this wasn't threatening at all. Maybe she was staying with a relative, she just didn't remember it; judging by her past behavior, Susan wouldn't be surprised if she killed someone and didn't remember it the next morning. But when she turned to her right, she was absolutely certain she was in a dream. Because it just was not possible.

It wasn't possible that _he_ was lying next to her. It wasn't possible that it was his hair that brushed against her arm, the same hair that she had run her hand through in her dreams. It wasn't possible that it was hisheat that she felt through the thin layer of sheets, the heat that had enveloped her when he held her in his arms every night in her mind. It wasn't possible that it was his skin that turned a golden bronze in the sunlight, his chest that rose up and down in soft, even breathing, hiseagle brows that were furrowed gently in sleep, his hand that just lay mere inches from her own. _His_ eyes that were opening slowly, their deep russet depths shining with flecks of auburn, chocolate, and a rich gold.

It wasn't possible.

Her traitorous heart picked up pace and she tried desperately to slow it down. The rational part of her mind warned herself not to believe her own imagination, not to believe her hopes that had taken on a life of their own. Her heart had already been broken too many times, and it was all she could do to pick up the pieces as they fell; did she have to crush them, to break them into bits so small they couldn't be put back together again? But the illogical part of her refused to let go of the fact that his eyes never looked that bright in her dreams, never carried that much raw emotion, never brimmed over with tears that rolled down his cheeks.

"Susan."

…never sounded so beautiful.

* * *

It wasn't possible.

It wasn't possible that _she_ was lying next to him. It wasn't possible that it was her eyes that looked at him now, those sky-blue eyes that he drowned in every time he closed his eyes. It wasn't possible that it was her lips that were trembling, the lips that had pressed against his and branded him, bruising him with the gentleness of it. It wasn't possible that it was her pale skin that was separated from his own by only a thin layer of sheets, her uniquely pure, sweet scent that was permeating the air, her brown tresses that were tangled in beautiful, cascading curls, framing her face.

It wasn't possible.

And still, he felt her name rise to his lips like it had so many times before, only this time, he hoped impossibly for an answer. Because never before in dreams had she looked so _real_, like he could almost reach out and touch her. And a small part of him couldn't help but believe Aslan when the Lion had promised him the fulfillment of his request.

"Susan…"

To his shock, she backed away in horror, tears falling freely from her eyes now, clinging to her thick lashes.

"No please, don't…please don't say anything. I-It's too real, and I can't…I can't…oh god, please let this be over…"

Susan couldn't believe the extent of her imagination. He looked so unbelievably authentic, like she could almost take the hand that was stretched towards her and not have it fade away when she woke up. She wished she could stop herself from hoping, but this dream wasn't making it any easier for her.

"Susan, please don't cry. You're not dreaming, this is real. Please, Susan, just listen to me. I really am Caspian…"

"_No_! Stop torturing me!!" Her mumblings had turned into distressed cries. "I can't wake up again from this, I can't live like this! Please, whoever you are, whatever you are, just go away! I can't do this, I ca—"

His lips were upon her's before she could finish, one hand gently cradling the back of her neck, and the other reaching around her waist and pulling her flush against him. His lips moved tenderly on hers, and his thumb caressed her cheek, wiping away the tears that had escaped. She was even more perfect than he had dreamt. Her skin was so smooth, her lips impossibly soft, her small body incredibly warm as it pressed against his…

Suddenly, he broke the kiss pulled away, arms leaving her waist. For an impossibly long moment, the two stayed just a few inches apart, breaths mingling in the distance between them. Susan could still feel the hot pressure of his lips, and wonderingly, she raised up a hand to touch her mouth. The taste of him was still branded into her senses, and she began to wonder if there was a remote chance this was reality. Even her imagination wasn't this wonderful, and she certainly wasn't able to conjure up something this breathtaking on her own. But when Susan looked into his eyes, she was certain. This was no dream.

Because she could never make up the painful hope in his eyes, that desperately eager wish for a response from her. It was so expectant yet so patient at the same time, and his hands at his side fairly shook with nervousness. She could see that he doubted himself, that he wondered whether or not his actions were too rash. Susan felt her heart warm at his sincerity and boyish uneasiness. He ruled a country with no panic, rode into a battle, sword raised, with a fearless battle cry, and yet _she_ was the thing that daunted him the most.

And Susan wanted more than anything to put those fears to rest.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and closed the space between them in an instant, bringing her mouth to his with the same vigor that he had kissed her with. Her heart fairly sang when she found his response, the strong arms bringing her closer into him, drawing her into his warmth and the lips that moved insistently but tenderly on hers.

So _this _is what fulfillment felt like. This is what bread felt like after an insatiable hunger, what water felt like after a long, parched thirst. The pain that had left a bleeding, gaping hole where her heart was supposed to be slowly subsided, and she could feel the wound healing, closing. She felt her body began to warm, something it hadn't done in a long time, and she drew herself still closer to him, hungry for the feel of him, the smell of him. And for the first time in ages, she felt joy.

When they finally broke apart, Susan raised one hand and gently traced his face. His brow, his nose, his lips…more perfect than she remembered. Then she placed it softly on his chest and wondered at the wild rhythm of his heart beating under her fingertips.

"You did that," he said quietly, placing his hand on top of her's.

Susan smiled. "I'd let you feel how fast my heart is beating too, but since it is in a slightly compromising place, you'll just have to take my word for it." Caspian's mouth curved up into a smile and his eyes shone. But then his expression changed to one of that Susan didn't know how to describe. It was so happy, so hopeful, and yet so sad, as if old memories had come back. Susan gasped as he grabbed her almost roughly and embraced her, his arms holding her so close she could barely breathe. She locked her arms around him in return, breathing in his scent deeply. Suddenly, Susan felt a wetness on her shoulder as his grip tightened and his shoulders shook slightly.

"I've missed you so much," he whispered, his breath hot on her skin. Susan buried her head in his shoulder, feeling the cotton of his nightshirt against her cheek. Tears of her own ran down her face and she closed her eyes.

"I've missed you too. So, so much," murmured Susan and buried herself deeper in his warmth, feeling the comfort, protection and lovewash over her.

And then, the most curious thing happened.

She didn't hurt anymore. It was as if all the pain from the past couple of months never happened. She was whole, unbroken, complete. All wounds healed, all the bits of her heart picked up and pieced together. It was even beating now, stronger than ever.

She was home.

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**Sorry this was so overly long, but again, wanted to catch the moment. Please please review, I really need feedback about how to improve this chapter, because I'm not entirely satisfied with it, and I don't know how to change it. Also, I have no idea where I'm going with this, so plot suggestions you would like to see would be heavenly too. Thanks again, your views are much appreciated! **


	6. Ruler of Nations, or Awkward Schoolboy?

**A/N: Sorry this chapter took me so long, my computer plus writer's block has been giving me craploads of trouble. But it's finally up, and it's pure, undaulterated fluff. It's something very sweet and very very cute after all the depressing chapters before, so I hope you guys like it. Read away!**

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**Chapter 6**

There were many instances in Susan's life when she thought nothing could get any better, when she felt that glowing happiness inside. The sun shone a little brighter during those times, her smile stretched a little wider, and her soul grew a little warmer. It was during those moments when she thought she was certainly the happiest she had ever been, and ever could be. Susan had tried to memorize those times, committing each and every detail, no matter how minute, to memory. Instances like that were too precious, too rare to just live once; she wanted to capture every glorious second and keep it tucked away so it would never be forgotten.

But this one day left all of those memories in the dark.

Every shining moment glimmered with such intensity that it flooded her mind, and Susan soon gave up trying to remember every little detail, simply because she couldn't take it all in. The place where she kept all those earlier memories was long overflowing, and her careful calculation of each event would most likely not do it justice. So she just let go.

There were no words to describe Susan's emotions during the course of that day, because complete perfection went beyond words. The moment she'd stepped outside of the castle, a sense of belonging filled her. The flowers were just starting to bloom and the newly-sprouted leaves on the trees were a tender, translucent green. The sun's rays warmed Susan's skin and she smiled, closing her eyes and breathing in the crisp, sweet air. She inhaled greedily, feeling the fresh air fill her lungs and her whole body becoming lighter, cleaner even. Even the wind seemed to whisper a song as it rushed across the lush landscape.

And the creatures! Everywhere she looked, there was activity. On her right, a mole was finishing up his spring cleaning, and a young squirrel with a mouthful of acorns was scurrying up the trees to escape his furious mother, chattering up a storm. On her left, a badger was greeting a faun, and a beaver family was gnawing on a few branches to put on their dam. The birds overhead twittered as they swooped and dived in the air, coming very close to a smartly-clad young mouse who immediately scurried over to the protection of his mother.

"Susan, why are you crying?" She looked up the see the concerned face of Caspian, his hand gently brushing away the moisture at the corner of her eye. "Is something wrong?"

Caspian. At first, she'd been afraid that she would turn around and he would be gone, just like her other dreams. She'd whipped her head around and checked every few steps, much to his amusement. And every time she found him there, right next to her and walking in step with her, Susan's heart soared. She really was back, and he really was holding her hand. Susan felt like she could fly.

"No, nothing's wrong," she answered, sniffling and laughing at Caspian's confused expression. "I'm just very, very happy."

They'd gone to the stables and saddled up two beautiful horses, a chocolate gelding for Caspian and the ever-faithful Destrier for Susan. And then Susan had felt the wind whipping through her hair, the steady rhythm of hooves pounding on the ground, and the sheer freedom that came with riding. As she crested a hill, Susan let go of the reins and let Destrier take over, her hands spread put and her eyes closed. An exhilarated cry broke from her lips as Destrier took a flying leap over a stream. Flying, flying…

And when she hit the ground and looked to her right, Caspian was right next to her, the two horses riding neck to neck. The wind snatched playfully at his tousled hair and all the worries and stress that came with a position of royalty slipped away. He was no longer _King_ Caspian….he was Susan's Prince. The boyish innocence that Susan had come to love was glowing on his face, a carefree smile gracing his visage. And when he looked over at Susan, that smile grew brighter.

When afternoon came, the two had stopped in a clearing. Susan tied Destrier carefully to a nearby oak and patted it gently before letting the tired mare graze. Then she turned and stepped into the clearing.

There was one lone tree standing in the middle, the leaves glinting in the sunlight. The branches swayed quietly in the soft breeze, the lush foliage making a lovely rustling sound. Susan sighed as she lay down under the tree, feeling her sore muscles unclench themselves and her back straighten against the cool, springy grass. The sunlight streamed in through the leaves and she turned her face to the side, waiting for Caspian to sit next to her.

It was the same clearing. Caspian looked around at the grassy area around him, amazed at how different it looked now that the situation had changed so much. It had been raining last time, and everything was so incredibly cold. And Aslan had come to him, and he'd chosen…and then he cried and cried until the sobs were just dry gasps of breath, the rain still relentlessly pounding his skin, beating his body into submission. He'd woken up the next morning in his own bed, and found out that it was Destrier who had run back to the castle to get help after he had collapsed.

It was so different now. Everything was warm and wonderful, the smells of spring beginning to soak into everything. Even the clouds that had been so prevalent that night had cleared, leaving the blazing sunshine to light up everything in a golden sheen. But even if it had still been raining, if it still had been dark and cold, as long as _she_ was here, he wouldn't want to be anywhere else.

"Caspian? What's wrong? You look so sad." Susan's voice pulled him back to reality and he walked over to where she lay, sitting down in the grass beside her. Susan gently laid her head in his lip and played idly with the fastenings of his boots. "Is something the matter?"

The young king smiled and ran a hand through Susan's hair, fingering the silky strands as they fell through his fingers. "This is the same clearing…the one where Aslan came to meet me, the one where I made the choice. I am just remembering what it felt like that night, and it is all so different now…now that you are here." Susan looked up at him and smiled.

"That's a good thing, I'm supposing? That it's different?"

Caspian grinned and pulled his face down to hers, planting a kiss on the tip of her nose. "You have no idea."

He still couldn't believe it. He'd spent the good part of the morning with her already, and the fact that Susan was there with him, laughing, talking, _being_, was overwhelming. But he'd suspended disbelief, because the moments were too precious to waste on incredulity and wonder.

His eyes traveled down the length of her body spread out leisurely in the grass. The rich gold on her gown complemented the crimson silk that draped down her sides. Caspian couldn't help feeling a bit proud. It was the gown that he had made for her and designed for her after she had left, not being able to keep his thoughts focused. He'd conjured up the image of the gown in his mind, adjusting it so that it would accentuate her beauty, and promptly assigned his best tailors to the task of making a dress that would never be worn. He thought he would never see the day when Susan Pevensie would fill that dress, but dreams did come true, and here she was. Queen Susan the Gentle. The Lovely. The Exquisite. The soft fabric hugged every curve on her body, the neckline revealing a teasing section of bare, creamy skin and the shadow between her breasts accented with an amber pendant. Caspian felt his face heat up and the blood start to flow hotter in his veins, but couldn't force himself to look away, couldn't stop the images that ran through his mind of him tearing away the fabric to reveal more of that soft, buttery skin. Susan drew him in like a moth to a radiant, blazing flame and he didn't even try resist; he'd been without her for far, too long.

"It's rude to stare, you know." The blush crept higher as Caspian looked away quickly, tearing his eyes away from their prolonged inspection.

"I am s-sorry, I didn't mean to be…disrespectful…I really—" The sound of Susan's silvery laugh interrupted his mumbled, embarrassed apology and he looked up to see that she had straightened. Susan settled herself with her back against his chest, pulling his arms around her securely and thoroughly startling an embarrassed but happy Caspian.

"Sometimes you act like a ruler of nations, and sometimes, you're almost as bad as a schoolboy." Susan chuckled and tilted her head to rest on one arm. "Which one is it, really?" Caspian grinned and tightened his hold on her, bringing his nose to the crook of her neck and nuzzling the soft skin there.

"I think I prefer the 'ruler of nations' to the schoolboy," he murmured quietly, lips brushing her neck.

"Are you?" Susan replied quietly and tilting her face back to meet his, a mischievous glint in her eye.

"I would like to think so."

"Then prove it." Susan closed the distance between them, sighing as her lips met Caspian's.

Every time they shared a kiss, Susan remembered all those books she had read when she was back in England. All those romance novels where the hero and the heroine shared some magical, earth-shattering embrace made Susan roll her eyes in exasperation. When would people understand that it was impossible for a person to literally melt, and that a person couldn't _taste _like chocolate or any other sugary confection; people were _people_, not candy. And if someone's heartbeat was genuinely beating as fast as it was described, they would have gone into cardiac arrest. It wasn't logical, it didn't stand to reason.

And then Caspian had come along, effectively shutting her up.

Because now she understood what was described in those books. She found it was quite possible to melt during a kiss, because when her entire body was on fire and all she could see was a blinding red behind her eyelids, "melting" was the only word that was a fitting description. And she found that people did taste like something, just maybe not chocolate. Susan's senses were spiraling with his unique scent, that musky, woodsy smell with an overtone of leather. And he tasted…wonderful. Susan was also convinced that she had undergone several heart attacks by now with the unnatural pace her heart was beating at. But it was quite impossible not to feel short of breath and lightheaded, not when _his_ hands were roaming over her body, leaving trails of fire in their wake. Not when his lips trailed down her neck, branding her skin. Not when she opened her eyes and saw the twin russet pools of fire looking back at her, consuming her. _Yes_, Susan decided, reaching for him again, and closing her eyes, _quite impossible. _

And she didn't mind at all.

Neither of them paid attention to the shadows that were getting just a little longer, or the sun that was just a little higher in the sky. Or the ticking of that silent clock, counting down the hours…

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**A/N: Dun, dun, dun! So, I need your opinion. Should I include an extra chapter of pure fluff again, or should I bring in the depressing stuff at the end of the day? I need some advice, please!! So please review and tell me what you think! Much love!**


	7. This Is Home

**A/N: Okay, warning: MATURE CONTENT IN THIS CHAPTER. Don't read if it at all offends you. This took me awhile because I don't usually write scenes like this, so this was a challenge for me. I really didn't do it, Caspian and Susan just sort of went off on their own. All I did was to pen down their decisions shrug This is what came out. So, please read and review!! A long chapter coming up!**

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**Chapter 7**

Powerful waves crashed against the bluff, water breaking along the rocks and shattering into a million droplets of salty ocean spray. The seagulls cawed overhead and spread their white wings, riding on the gusts of warm air that rose off the sea. They bobbed lower and lower, then higher and higher until they became part of the wispy clouds overhead.

The sand was arm under Susan's bare feet as she sat down on the beach. The ruins of Cair Paravel loomed above them and she at the sky, exhaling in satisfaction as a sea breeze teased her hair. She felt Caspian sit down next to her, and smiled.

"Why did you bring me here, Susan? It is very beautiful, but…" Susan looked over at Caspian's puzzled face.

"This is where we came." Seeing that her explanation did nothing to improve Caspian's confusion, she continued. "This is where Peter, Ed, Lucy and I came into Narnia this time. Through that cave right over there." She pointed at the gaping mouth of the cove. Susan' eyes took on a faraway expression as if she were back in that day.

"We were all just waiting for the train when Lu jumped into the air and yelped, saying that something had pinched her. And I was so annoyed with her because I was trying to avoid a boy who kept following me." Susan laughed, "I told him my name was Phyllis. I thought she was daft, but soon after, Pete felt it then Ed and I. The wind became very, very strong, and my hair whipped around my face so much, it was hard to see. And then train station was…being sucked away into the tunnel, the flyers being shredded off the walls, the walls cracking, benches ripped right out of the ground. I wasn't scared though, like I should have been. I just felt…calm, I suppose.

"Through all that chaos, the train still came rumbling through, it's noise on the tracks so loud I couldn't hear anything else. And then…through the windows… oh Caspian, it was beautiful. I could see the ocean spread out and the green trees, the woods fanning out in the distance. And then the train disappeared into the tunnel, and for a second….for a second I was blinded. When I could see again, the tunnel had become the entrance to the cove. And we were in Narnia again."

"You came to me," he said quietly and put an arm around her shoulders, bringing her into him.

"I came to you," she replied, but didn't give Caspian the smile he was searching for. She pulled away slightly brought her knees closer to her chest, hugging herself. Why did the sea breeze suddenly seem so much colder than before?

"I cannot read your thoughts, my Queen. Do you regret coming to me?"

"No, that's not it at all." She shook her head. "It's just…do you ever wonder…if maybe, just maybe," Susan stuttered, worriedly searching for the appropriate words, "would it…would it be easier if we never, I mean…if we didn't—"

"If we never met?" Susan looked up at him, her timid glance answering his question.

How could she think that? How could she ever, _ever_ think that? Caspian felt sadness well up inside him at her doubt. That's why he had made the choice he did, because he would rather endure all the pain in the world and spend this one day with her then to waste their love and forget it all. He'd chosen the hard way out because he'd valued her over the easy way out.

In one movement he had gathered her in his arms, holding her so painfully tight she could scarcely breathe.

"Never," he whispered in her ear, his breath hot against her ear. He held her at arm's length, looking intently at her suddenly too-bright eyes.

"No matter what happens, we will always have met, always have lived, always have loved. It does not matter what would have been easier, or what would have caused less pain…there is only what is. And what is, is that you are mine. I love you, Susan Pevensie. Eternally."

The silence that followed was the most beautiful Susan had ever heard. Because it was in that silence that his words echoed in her mind and finally settled. It was in that silence that she finally gave up all doubt. And it was in that silence that she comprehended the intensity of her own feelings. They mirrored his, and filled her, completely and entirely.

The tears finally spilled over and she threw herself in Caspian's arms, holding his body as close as she could to hers, feeling the way he held her, the way she fit perfectly into him.

"And I love you, Caspian. For forever and a day."

They'd rested awhile just leaning against each other, feeling the sun soak into their skin and letting the water lap at their feet. Then, in one sudden movement, Susan bolted into the air and ran into the ocean.

Susan rushed right into the surf, laughing out loud as the cool water played around her legs. Caspian's words filled her and with a sigh, she tilted her head back, feeling the sun on her face, and spun around before leaning all the way back and falling into the shallow water with a splash. She'd know it all along, but it was so wonderful to hear it proclaimed. He loved her. He loved her. Caspian loved her. _It was so wonderful to laugh again_, Susan mused as she looked up into the flawless blue sky. She had never felt so….so free, before. Her toes wriggled into the sand beneath her toes and she felt her hair float around her in the shallows. Smiling, she closed her eyes.

Suddenly, she was being held up, a hand thumping unceremoniously on her back.

"Susan, are you alright? Speak to me…Susan!" The thumping on her back became more vigorous, driving her into a series of hacking coughs.

"Cas—Caspian! St-stop!"

"Oh, thank Aslan, you're alright!" The relief was almost tangible in his voice. "I thought for sure—"

"What are y—I'm not drowning!"

"Susan, it's alright, just breathe, I'll…"

"Caspian, _stop pounding my back_!"

"What? Oh!" Sheepishly, he turned his previous hammering into little pats. Susan turned around, pinning Caspian's arms to his side and looked into his peevish, embarrassed eyes.

"Next time, ask me first before you go about saving me, alright? It was a lovely gesture, but…I wasn't in any danger." Susan couldn't help but a laugh a little at the redness that was creeping up his face.

"I am sorry, you just fell into the water, and I just thought…" She took his hand and placed it in the water.

"See? It barely comes up to your wrist." She smiled. "I'm fine." Susan looked at the red that was now working its way up his face. Suddenly, the embarrassed expression melted away and was replaced by a mischievous grin. With a growl he jumped on her and pinned her beneath him in the water.

"That is for scaring me," he said, voice low and planted a soft kiss on her lips. Susan wrapped her eyes around his neck and brought him closer.

"Well then, maybe I should scare you more often. If this is what happens, I'm not going to complain."

"Don't push your luck," he murmured, before Susan pulled him down, effectively silencing him.

The growing heat of their bodies was countered by the cool water swirling around them. His lips were persistent, moving form her lips to her ear, along her jaw, down her neck. She tilted her head back to give him better access and felt the heat of his hands on her waist, his lips searing on her collarbone before traveling back up to rest on her lips. Her hands gripped his back, pressing him down to her, needing the feel of his body on top of hers. She threaded her hands through his wet hair, gripping the back of his neck. The heat in the pit of her stomach grew as his hand brushed across her breast. Unconsciously, she pushed into him, wanting more of the contact that had spread electricity through her entire body.

Caspian felt like he was burning. She was impossible to refuse, the way she looked when she bit her lip, the way her breath hitched when he kissed her neck, the needful way her hands pulled at him…he didn't know how much more of this he could take. The water had made the dress heavy, and it clung to her like a second skin, leaving very little to the imagination. He couldn't stop staring, couldn't stop his body from reacting, couldn't help the need that rose within him like a hungry flame.

But he knew he couldn't just follow his impulse. She was precious, and she was fragile. He wanted more than anything to rip off the flimsy fabric and make her his, but she deserved so much more than that. She was to be cherished and treasured, not treated like a fleeting fancy. Caspian swallowed hard as she pushed her breast into his hand, the flame becoming a full-fledged conflagration. He had to control himself before he went too far.

"Susan."

His voice was so low it was almost foreign to her, but Susan didn't miss the strain and pleading mixed in with it. She felt his hardness pressing into her stomach, and knew how hard he was trying to restrain himself. Susan had known a few boys back in Finchley, and had heard the gossip among her friends, too. She knew how the technicalities about the process and thought that she would be cool-headed when the time came. But there was nothing technical about this. It was all heat and burning and skin and touch and feeling. His eyes were molten chocolate, and they held infinite emotions in them. They were asking for permission, asking her what she wanted.

"I'm sure," she whispered, "but what do _you_ want?"

He leaned down to whisper in her ear. "You."

He sealed the declaration with a kiss and Susan arched up to him as his hands traveled down to her chest, peeling away the fabric as he went. His kisses were light and teasing on her breasts and he took one his hand before closing his mouth over it. Susan gasped out loud as he teased her, the wet heat of his lips and tongue sending fire shooting down her spine to that ever-growing heat inside her. He moved on the other, lavishing the same attention on it, and a small moan escaped Susan's lips. She didn't know anything could feel this…wonderful.

She unbuttoned his doublet at the same time he untied her dress. The coolness of the water on her heated skin was wonderful, and when she finally removed Caspian's undershirt, she found it hard to breathe. The sun shone from behind and made him practically sparkle. Water dripped down his hair and onto the hard planes of his chest. They ran down the length of his torso and sparkled in the sun like diamonds. Wonderingly, Susan reached up a hand a placed in on his chest, running it over his bronze shoulders and toned stomach. He was hers. Hers, and she couldn't believe it.

Shyly, Susan reached to her own dress and peeled the rest of it away, tossing it onto dry sand. She resisted the urge to cover herself and lay back in the sand, anxiously watching Caspian's face. She felt completely and utterly exposed; doing something so impulsive wasn't her nature, but she found that he had a habit of changing that. She would never have fallen for someone impossible to love, but he had made himself an exception. Right before they left, Susan had kissed Caspian on the spur of the moment. Spontaneity was never one of her traits, but it seemed like he was changing that as well. And now, she was baring all to a man, when she wouldn't even feel comfortable in a bathing suit in front of her brothers and sister. She was changing, and Susan found that she liked it.

His blood was running so hot in his veins Caspian was sure he was going to explode. His mouth went dry as he looked on the goddess before him. Her pale, flawless skin glittered in the sun like a diamond with a million facets. Her hair floated around her in the water, crowning her in a chestnut halo. His eyes traveled down the length of her body and he felt himself harden to point of aching. She was excruciatingly lovely, and she was right in front of him. And in those sparkling blue eyes, was assured and tranquil permission.

He fell upon her like a starved man, covering every inch he could reach of her with his lips. Susan arched into him, feeling every part of him, skin against skin, flesh against flesh. Curiosity reared inside her and she reached a hand between them, grasping the stiff column of flesh. Caspian froze and a low moan rose to his lips.

"Aslan," he murmured into her neck, and experimentally she moved her hands, sliding it up and bringing it back down. She vaguely remembered a girl at school recounting her latest escapade at a party, and recalled her mentioning something like this. Apparently, it worked. Caspian's moan changed into a labored gasp as she repeated her movements. A grin played at Susan's lips and in one deft movement, she'd flipped him over. Still, she continued her ministrations, and Caspian threw his head back as she increased the pace. His breathing grew more shallow and he let out a low groan. Susan also remembered something else the girl had said, and she had blushed when she had heard it. But now, it didn't seem so ridiculous. If she was going to be impulsive, better go all the way. Hesitantly, Susan lowered her mouth and swallowed him.

A sharp cry broke from Caspian and he involuntarily shuddered, arching into Susan. Smiling, she lowered her head again, taking him deeper in her mouth and moving her tongue along his length.

"Susan!" he gasped hands gently lifting her head up.

"Am I doing something wrong?" she asked, a look of worry crossing her face.

"Gods, no! I didn't know how…I mean, where did you….how…"

Susan smiled. "Doesn't sound like there's a problem, then." Playfully, she took him in completely, hollowing out her cheeks, and relished in the way he clenched his jaw, a long, drawn-out moan escaping him.

"St-stop! Susan, I can't…" He swallowed hard. "I cannot hold on if you continue doing that."

"Then, what…" Gently, Caspian laid Susan on the sand, making sure she was comfortable and covering her body with his. She felt his hardness against her center and a kind of panic rose within her. This was it, there was no turning back now.

And then he kissed her. Not a hungry kiss, not a hard kiss. An exceedingly gentle, soft, tender kiss that left Susan breathless.

"I love you, Susan." And even though she'd heard it before, the declaration still took her breath away every time. Instantly, the panic went away and was replaced by a knowing calm.

"I love you, too."

The pain was sharp as he pushed into her. Susan gasped and closed her eyes, biting her lip to keep from crying out.

"Susan? Are you alright?" He lowered his head and kissed away the tears gathered at the corners of her eyes. "I'm so sorry, love…we can stop." Susan shook her head, and nodded.

"I'm fine. Just keep going." He rocked gently inside her, moving slowly and at a slow, steady pace to let her adjust. And soon, the pain faded away. It was replaced by a curious sensation, a dull, throbbing feeling that twisted somewhere deep inside and built with every rock. Susan felt herself pushing back into him, and felt the feeling grew stronger. Her gaze locked with his as the pace increased. His hand hooked behind her knee and hitched her leg up around his waist, and the sickly sweet sensation intensified in her belly. It twisted and built as she chased his hips with hers, her hands reaching around and pulling him closer towards her, needing more…more…

Her senses were on fire. Everything was raw and pure and passion and skin, and she craved it. All she could hear, see, touch, feel, taste, was the push and pull of their bodies in harmony, the closeness of him as he moved inside her. His hand disappeared between the two of them and without warning, stars exploded behind Susan's eyes. She gasped his name and keened against his hand, pushing herself deeper onto him. His name became a prayer, her only lifeline to reality. When he lowered his mouth to her breast and hit…right…there…Susan moaned as the coiling inside grew tighter.

Caspian groaned as he rocked faster. She gripped him and drew him back in. All he could feel was heat, a blinding, burning wet heat. He clenched his jaw and tried to control himself, control the sensation that was building in his center. But his heart beat sped up with each thrust and he felt her hands clawing on his back and shoulders, urging him on.

Their gazes met and at that moment where burning russet met shattering sapphire, everything changed. He felt Susan clench around him, and she felt Caspian shudder inside her. Susan let out a sharp cry as the coil within her sudden released with a last thrust and a deft movement of his fingers, and Caspian gasped her name as she clenched and pulsed around him, releasing his warmth into her. The world became a vast expanse of blinding, white-hot intensity, both riding out the waves of extreme pleasure that crashed through them.

Moments later, the white explosions behind his eyes receded and he pushed himself gently off her, rolling onto his side, letting the water roll over them. He raised a hand and brushed her cheek.

"Did I hurt you?" he asked quietly, stroking her hair. Her eyes filled and she smiled.

"No. You could never hurt me." She scooted closer to him and lay next to him, feeling his arms snake around her protectively.

"Don't leave," she whispered, looking back at him.

"I won't, Susan. I never will." She smiled, satisfied and snuggled closer to him. The tide changed slightly and the ocean rose to meet them a little more, the water effectively covering them, lapping and swirling at their shoulders. This is home, she thought, closing her eyes. This is home.

In the distance, the sun sank a little lower in the sky…

* * *

**A/N: Whew! That was a long one! Please tell me what you think about this chapter, 'cause it took awhile to write and I would REALLY appreciate feedback. Thanks again!! Love you all!!**


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